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Way Too Optimistic 2017 Miami Dolphins Win/Loss Predictions

NFL: Miami Dolphins at New York Jets Dennis Schneidler-USA TODAY Sports

Last season was the beginning of the Adam Gase Era in Miami. It was also the first year I wrote one of these articles and surprisingly enough, I accurately predicted the Dolphins to go 10-6 in 2016. Yes, I was completely off with some of the games but that’s beside the point. In fact, ever since I accurately predicted the Dolphins to go 10-6, a lot of folks have started calling me Houtzradamus. Now that the 2017 schedule finally released, I will now unleash my 100% accurate 2017 Miami Dolphins win/loss prediction. Enjoy.

Week 1 vs Tampa Bay Buccaneers---- Win (1-0)

There’s not a Dolphins’ fan in the world that doesn’t hate Miko Grimes. After several months of being showcased on Hard Knocks, the distractions finally catch up with the Tampa Bay Bucs. Miami is the superior football team and gets a convincing win at home.

Week 2 @ Los Angeles Chargers---- Win (2-0)

After defeating the Bucs in Week 1, Miami flies cross-country to take on the relocated Chargers. This game is a dog fight, as San Diego’s defense causes nightmares for Adam Gase and his offense. A last second field goal from Adam Franks gives the Dolphins the win.

Week 3 @ New York Jets---- Win (3-0)

The Jets are trash and until they have a quarterback, they will remain trash. I will be at this game along with Sutton and MC$$$. We are 1-0 lifetime when the three of us are together, so this outcome is essentially a given. Miami begins the season 3-0, on their way to another 1972-esque season.

Week 4 vs New Orleans Saints---- Loss (3-1)

Welp, that didn’t last long. After a great start to the 2017 season, Miami travels to London to take on Drew Brees and the New Orleans Saints. Worst part about this game is that it’s considered a “Dolphins’ home game” despite being played in another country. Brees (yes, that Brees) lights up the team he should’ve ultimately played for, resulting in Miami’s first loss.

Week 5 vs Tennessee Titans---- Loss (3-2)

I was in attendance last year when the Titans laid a whooping on Gase’s Dolphins. Miami was unable to stop the run game and Rishard Matthews got his redemption with a touchdown catch. This was the game that most would remember as the “We want Moore!” “We want Moore!” game. Miami keeps the game close but ultimately falls to the scrappy Titans.

Week 6 @ Atlanta Falcons---- Loss (3-3)

Despite blowing a 28-3 lead in the Super Bowl, it’s very hard to think the Dolphins can defeat the former NFC Champions. Miami has struggled against the run recently and Atlanta has one of the best two-headed monsters in the league. The Dolphins keep things close, but in the end lose their third consecutive game.

Week 7 vs New York Jets---- Win (4-3)

After losing three consecutive games, the Dolphins once again face their division rival in upstate New York Jersey. Fortunately for Miami, the Jets still aren’t very good and still do not have an NFL quarterback. Despite being a big Todd Bowles’ fan during his tenure in Miami, what he’s done as head coach has been rather disappointing. In 2017, the Miami Dolphins sweep the Jets.

Week 8 @ Baltimore Ravens---- Win (5-3)

Miami often struggles vs Baltimore and did so again last year when they got spanked at M&T stadium. However, this time when visiting Baltimore, their luck is about to change. This time, the Dolphins handedly beat their AFC North foes.

Week 9 vs Oakland Raiders---- Win (6-3)

Last time these two teams played, Miami laid the smack down on Oakland who ultimately left Dennis Allen in London. Oakland is a top-5 AFC team, but Miami manages to beat them at home on Sunday Night Football. A very, very special game for Miami Dolphin fans.

Week 10 @ Carolina Panthers----Loss (6-4)

In 2016, the Carolina Panthers were difficult to watch. Personally, I don’t let one bad year define a team. Unfortunately for the Dolphins, Carolina is looking more like the team from 2014. After winning three straight, Miami suffers a disappointing loss to the Panthers.


Week 12 @ New England Patriots---- Win (7-4)

After their bye week, Miami showcases a bunch of new formations offensively. Drake is utilized more as a receiving threat and Miami continues to find a way to feed Jarvis Landry the football. Despite going 0-2 in 2016 against their division rivals, Miami wins their first meeting of the 2017 season.

Week 13 vs Denver Broncos---- Win (8-4)

Although Denver possesses one of the league’s best defenses, their offense is severely lacking a very important position. Quarterback. Whether it’s Siemian or Lynch, the Dolphins defense could wreak havoc for the inexperienced signal caller. This game goes down to the wire, but Miami is able to hold off the 2015 Super Bowl Champs.

Week 14 vs New England Patriots---- Loss (8-5)

A few weeks ago, Jarvis Landry said the Dolphins would sweep the New England Patriots. I don’t have anything wrong with Landry saying such things, but the chance of it happening is slim to none. Miami was able to pull out a win in Foxborough, but fall mercifully at home. Miami splits their season series with the Pats and are still alive in the playoff race.

Week 15 @ Buffalo Bills---- Win (9-5)

I’ve been to Buffalo and the stadium is pretty much what you’d expect from a dreary town so close to Canada. McDermott is a good head coach but needs a year or two to get the Bills headed in the right direction. The Dolphins defeat the Bills convincingly at the Ralph.

Week 16 @ Kansas City---- Loss (9-6)

There are very few stadiums that have the same kind of impact that Arrowhead does. In addition, this game is going to be played in late December, one of the coldest games in Miami Dolphins’ history. My prediction is two potential playoff contenders, in a low-scoring affair. Ultimately, the home-field advantage is the difference and the Dolphins fall to the Chiefs 13-7

Week 17 vs Buffalo Bills---- Win (10-6)

Much like their previous game with the Bills, the Dolphins are clearly the better football team. With playoff hopes on the line, Adam Gase has his team ready to play. Jay Ajayi has another 200-yard game, and the Dolphins remain in the hunt for one of the remaining wild card spots. Miami sweeps the Bills in 2017.

Ultimately, I believe the Dolphins will finish with a eerily similar record to the one they achieved in 2016. Unfortunately, there is also a very good chance they take a step back in 2017, at least from a win perspective. In my opinion, it is very possible that the Dolphins only win 7 to 9 games this season and overall have a better team than last year. It is going to be a difficult task, but I think the Dolphins will finish 10-6, netting the team one of the AFC’s remaining wildcard spots.