clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Power Rankings Around the Net

New, comments

If you buy something from an SB Nation link, Vox Media may earn a commission. See our ethics statement.

This is going to be a painful trip, but let's go for it.  After all, we all still have our sense of humor, right?

-ESPN: 31

We love it when players weave in the lexicon of the Internet when discussing their teams. Following the loss to Oakland, Jason Taylor told the Miami Herald: "You can Google all the negative emotions and they're all there for me."

Ok...Thanks, JT.  Well I did Google "negative emotions" and a bunch of sites came up about overcoming negative emotions.  Maybe all of us fans should check these sites out to calm ourselves down.

-CBS Sports: 32

John Beck. John Beck. John Beck. John Beck. Get it, Cam Cameron. It's time to go to the kid.

Wow.  I think that might be the first time a member of the national media is calling for John Beck.  Is it getting close?  Is it time?  We'll have plenty of time to talk about this in the coming days and weeks.

-FOX Sports: 31

Daunte Culpepper pointed to his knee in a touchdown celebration, Justin Fargas ran for over 170 yards, and one of the league's most anemic offenses put up 35 points in Sunday's 35-17 loss to Oakland in Miami. Thus has been the story for the 2007 Dolphins. If there was any bright side to the hideous defeat in the rain, it was the play of running back Ronnie Brown. The third-year pro out of Auburn ran for 134 yards and caught six passes for 73 yards. The Dolphins are now 0-4 and alone in the AFC East cellar. They've got the 2-2 Texans up ahead on Sunday.

Ah, yes.  Thank heavens for Ronnie Brown.  Without his play these past 2 games, I think there'd be even angrier Dolphin fans.  And speaking of Ronnie, if he can pick up over 200 total yards on Sunday, he will become just the 2nd player to ever do accomplish that feat in NFL history.  Not too shabby for a "bust", huh Ronnie haters?

-Yahoo! Sports: 31 (Jason Cole) & 31 (Charles Robinson)

-The Sporting News: 32

Just in case Dolphins fans had forgotten Daunte Culpepper, he re-introduced himself Sunday.

Ouch!

-Covers.com: 30

Note to Miami: Daunte's knee is just fine, thanks.

Double ouch!!

-Football Locks: 31

The Dolphins found a way to surrender 35 points at home while allowing only 5 completions to Culpepper. That equates to 1 touchdown drive per completion! Allowing 299 yards of rushing can do that to a team. Miami has hit a new low.

Indeed.  I love the "1 touchdown drive per completion" stat.  That just makes me feel so much better.

-NFL Report: 32

And you wanted Trent Green over Daunte Culpepper, eh? Daunte produced better numbers in this game alone than Green has produced all year!

Hold on a minute!  That's a bit of a reach.  Daunte was 5 for 12 for just 75 yards.  Yes, he scored 5 times, but that's because of the effective running game and not because of Daunte.  But I'll stop myself before I get hostile.

Average Rank: 31

Well that's a new all-time low for a power ranking average after just 4 games.  Well, it is for at least my lifetime.  Not even the 4-12 2004 team was ranked this low after just 4 games.  In the words of Bruce Springsteen (from his latest CD, which is great and just released), "It's gonna be a long walk home."