Dolphins Kick Ass: Henne Hangups


Dolphin fans, I love you guys.  Some of you however need some prozac about this whole QB thing.  What's one more year giving Henne a chance going to hurt?  Maybe this Matt Moore guy might do some great things.  Perhaps Marino will come out of retirement.  Hey you know what?  Maybe Tom Brady will get tired of playing for hoodie and say he's in Miami bitch.  Maybe, OK, perhaps...look I'm tired of hearing about how bad Henne is.  

Sure the guy is not my first choice for QB.  Sure, he does dumb things.  But hey, he got workouts set up.  He is making diner for his team mates.  He is leading the charge on X Box Call to Duty and talking to his friends.  He is the real reason Jennifer Lopez became a minority owner, because Jennifer Lopez finds the robot sexy.  And now with Marc Anthony out of the picture, he will become her personal cabana boy.  OK maybe not.  Henne is part of this team, love him or hate him.  If he loses the QB battle or throws 5 picks on MNF, I have thought of seven ways he can help the Dolphins organization.

1-Send him to get new coaches instead of the owner.  Since he has such a great relationship with other teams (it really is the only way I can explain the INT), he might be able to entice a coach to come to the Phins.

2-Let him be a beer man.  Everyone loves the beer man.  It is one way you can get Dolphin fans to love him.

3-He can be a spokesman for Lenscrafters and hopefully can help Sun Life become Lenscrafters Stadium.  The opening line of the spot can go something like "when you stare down your receiver, you need to make sure you can see him" or something like that.

4-Have him go with OFF4L to bars and take the pictures when no one else is present to do so.  Honestly, I always wondered who is taking the pictures with him.  His wife goes to all those events with him?  That is an exceptional find then. We love seeing his pictures with Dolphins (and some of us still wonder how the hell does he make it happen) and people will appreciate the contributions Henne will bring to the Phinsider.

5-He can host a special event in Davie for all the kids who want to attend.  First they read books, and then they "dip and dunk" Oreo cookies in milk.  I don't know about you, but if you don't like Oreos and milk, you're a communist.

6-Let him host a summer camp for aspiring QBs and make it a blanket statement.  Kids don't try this on the field, let alone at home.

7-Let him take a plane to Denver, kidnap Orton after giving him a shower of Jack Daniels and Southern Comfort (there was a running joke here in Chicago about Orton getting really hammered after his first year with the Bears), suffocate him with those manboobs he was rocking during his summer vacation, and convince him that the Dolphins acquired him and Tim Tebow is the savior of Denver.  No draft picks, no players, nothing.  Done deal, because quite frankly that is the only way I would like to see Orton on this team (unless it costs a 4th or 5th, and a 2 year deal.)

OK, I got my bashing of Henne out of my system.  All I can tell you guys is this, if he does win the competition, lets support the man and cheer for him like we do for our team every Sunday.  He doesn't have a dinosaur as his OC anymore, he showed some maturity, and had some great practices.  If he can shake off the 2 picks last Friday and play some good ball, then we need to be supportive of that.  It isn't blindly following the front office like some of you meatballs said.  It is about supporting the team we love, through thick and thin.  If he is the guy, then he is our guy and we need to back him up.  Not boo him out of the building.

Thanks and I am counting down the days to 9/12 baby!

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of The Phinsider's writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of The Phinsider writers or editors.

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