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Randoms with Rizz

   Long time no post, what's good Phinsider? I would say I'm happy to be back, but I never went anywhere. The Phinsider will always be a site I check on a daily basis, because it's "for us, by us". No hidden agendas here, no editor asking you to tone down your opinions, just good old fashioned candid discussion about our favorite team - the Miami Dolphins. Matty did an amazing job building this site, I purpose a portrait of him somewhere on the front page. When the news came down, I was asked to become a bigger contributor here - and I was happy to help out.  If you remember my "ITM" posts from a few years ago, or have checked out MiamiHeatNation.com, you know what to expect - not much. I just hope to provide this place with some topics to discuss, and when we eventually suck, some laughs to numb the pain. So here's to another fun season of Miami Dolphins football, FINALLY! It feels like this off season has been three times longer than usual.

Star-divide

  So the other day I was at Target, and the power went out. I found myself alone, right in front of those "mix and match" candy bins. I realized "Hey the power is out, that must mean the cameras are out too!", and I proceeded to stuff my face full of different delicious treats. Sometimes you have to take advantage of a situation, and turn a negative into a positive. I'm hoping this season the Phins let it all loose, because let's be honest, what do they have to lose? Playing it close to the vest has got them nothing, why not go for it this season? Sparano and Ireland have to know their futures ride on what happens this season, a 6-10 year likely means they are toast. As much as I feel the Wildcat was overrated, it was bold, and it was different. The play itself was a result of desperation, and it worked out pretty good for awhile. If I'm Mike Nolan, I'm blitzing. If I'm Tony Sparano, I'm going for that fourth down. If I'm Jeff Ireland, I'm checking in on how Terrell Owens health is - WHY NOT?! The power is out, stuff your face with treats.

  New season, new rules, NO MORE PHINS UP DANCE! Have some damn pride Phins fans, do not put your hands on your heads this season, and go left to right - you look RIDICULOUS! We are better than this, this is a proud franchise damnit! You can't possibly make fun of Fireman Ed's J-E-T-S chant, then prance around like that - you can't have it both ways. Stephen Ross changed the song, but he didn't change your DNA -fight the douchey jumbotron. If Serena Williams asks you to rub your nipples after every TD, would you do it? Have some standards, it's a football game, not an episodes of the Wiggles.

  I'm willing to give this Daboll guy a chance, I like his energy. Blaming him for having a bad offense in Cleveland doesn't make much sense to me, I mean look at what he had to work with. It would be like blaming your wife for being a bad cook, when you only let her buy groceries at the dollar store. Henning was slowly poisoning this team with his terrible play calls, it's possible some of these guys are better than we think. I can remember Daboll using his athletes pretty well in Cleveland at times, from what I recall. His Wildcat last year with the Browns, was actually more successful than the Dolphins - so that won't be a problem. I look forward to rejoicing and screaming at the top of my lungs "DA BALLS!", after a successful scoring play call - give the dude a chance. 

  Overall I would say I am cautiously excited about this season. I like how the Phins have built this defense, but I'm worried the defensive backfield is far from as good as some seem to give it credit. The Offense should be more exciting, at the very least this season. With the addition of Gates and Bush, I can see a lot of "
something out of nothings" this year, which has not been the case in the past. If the Phins are going to be their annual average, at least be an exciting average - you know what I mean? This should be a fun season, full of more emotion that we have seen in years, because people's jobs are on the line - lets hope that translates into wins.

Comment 55 comments  |  5 recs  | 

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It would be like blaming your wife for being a bad cook, when you only let her buy groceries at the dollar store.

Funny as hell.

Ò°°°···‚‚‚ "I am more nervous than excited about this year" Patssuck456 ‚‚‚···°°°Ó
BandWaken Got me this Matty BLB award 2010
former Goof Trooper and proud recipient of the Matty JLRBotY award 2010 

by uncle finster on Aug 10, 2011 7:46 PM EDT reply actions  

I liked the Serena Williams comment

Great post rec

"I'm just a player trying to do what I'm told"--Brandon Marshall
"Ima take my talents to South Beach"--LeBron James
"Here comes the giant royal penis"--Dan LeBatard
Officially strapped on to Ryan "El Capitan" Lindley's bandwagon 2012
"I make onions cry"--Tom Brandstater

by AlejandroN on Aug 10, 2011 7:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

I WAS GOING TO POST THIS EXACT THING

i literally cracked up hahah

Laces out!
Editor of the Wildcat Weekly after every Victory
-2008 AFC East Champions-
BRANDON MARSHALL- FUTURE MIAMI HOF WR!!!!!

by BSerious72 on Aug 10, 2011 8:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

"If Serena Williams asks you to rub your nipples after every TD, would you do it?"

rofl, is this my new dolphins TD celebration?

only when I’m watching a game by myself? okay maybe.

by meleechampion on Aug 10, 2011 7:47 PM EDT reply actions  

Oh well; i do have a blow-up name (Syrenity) nice add-on ask a nabor over to the next game!

wopper "the king" computer
We often look rite past the positive's cuz the negative's-r-so hard they dominate!

by wild zion beaver on Aug 10, 2011 8:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

Don't invite Alpha over

With the 15th pick, the Miami Dolphins select John Stamos....'s brother

I probably know Judo! How many of you can make the same boast?

by Souwantmyname on Aug 10, 2011 11:08 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

He'd have a heyday with this one

What do you do when no one respects you? When you're so low you're not even an underdog? When your enemies are called kings? William Wallace would fight for every yard with his face painted aqua and orange. And so we will fight, not just for yards, but for touchdowns. And then they will fear us.
Chad Henne is 7 feet tall and consumes DBs with fireballs from his eyes and lightning bolts from his ass.

by BravePhin on Aug 10, 2011 11:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

That IS A6, over on the left!

Just think how stupid the average Jest fan is, and then realize that half of them are even stupider! ( a parody of a George Carlin line)

by PhinsTifosi on Aug 11, 2011 12:09 AM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

Tifosi; i do belive you (hit the nail) "on the head" with that one!

wopper "the king" computer
We often look rite past the positive's cuz the negative's-r-so hard they dominate!

by wild zion beaver on Aug 11, 2011 1:10 AM EDT up reply actions  

You're beggin to have your flat tail lifted and get a terrific spanking there Beav...

lol

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 1:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Recreational toys, hold still dame!

wopper "the king" computer
We often look rite past the positive's cuz the negative's-r-so hard they dominate!

by wild zion beaver on Aug 11, 2011 1:12 AM EDT up reply actions  

hahahahahahaha

Self-proclaimed president of the Pat White and Brian Hartline fan club.
The one and only "ho-nerd"

by samdaman on Aug 11, 2011 8:16 AM EDT up reply actions  

First off, I'm not the monkey.... Enhalen is.

And secondly, I own the monkey. And he will stretch your nips for a small charge.

CAPTION:
“Holy stretched nipples Batman!! That looks like an old Uncle Finster!!”

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 1:34 PM EDT up reply actions  

Look forward to future contributions. Matty did one hell of a job building this site and menbers.

Mosul is continuing the success and doing awesome with some great and insightful write ups. Keep up the great work Mosul.

by D0lphins4Life on Aug 10, 2011 7:48 PM EDT reply actions  

The whole fins up thing is funny as hell. They really need to come up with something else.

Have some king of fan poll and let the winner win season tickets or some thing, but what else can we do, as much as I love our beloved Dolphins, they’re still just a Dolphin. How about “Bottles Up” for all us alcohol lovers and get it Bottle nose. LOL! not really but hey what else can you do.

by D0lphins4Life on Aug 10, 2011 7:53 PM EDT reply actions  

the wolf thing was cool for minute

but my neighbors thought we were all crazy,howling like a pack of wolves after a score or a wake sack, lol.

founding member of the dolphins really old bastards fan club

by daytonadolfan on Aug 10, 2011 8:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

and the feild goal fist pump has got to go !!!!

founding member of the dolphins really old bastards fan club

by daytonadolfan on Aug 10, 2011 8:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

The field goals have to go. I don't mind the fist pump, lol

And by go I mean turned into touchdowns.

What do you do when no one respects you? When you're so low you're not even an underdog? When your enemies are called kings? William Wallace would fight for every yard with his face painted aqua and orange. And so we will fight, not just for yards, but for touchdowns. And then they will fear us.
Chad Henne is 7 feet tall and consumes DBs with fireballs from his eyes and lightning bolts from his ass.

by BravePhin on Aug 10, 2011 9:42 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, we knew you liked the fist pump.... lol

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 1:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

I hear you but Sparano said

“I will continue to fist pump at FGs because that is my nature”

"The first thing I do when I get out of bed and feel the jolt in my knees is think of Roy Winston. On the second step, my calcified Adam's apple starts bobbing, and I think of Carl Eller. A few more steps in the dark and it's Willie Lanier. By the time I get to the bathroom, I'm flashing back to Dick Butkus and Ray Nitschke. And when the light finally comes on, I just hope that somewhere in the darkness they're thinking of me, too" - Larry Csonka.
He played before my time but one of the toughest SOBs to ever play!

by Strange on Aug 10, 2011 10:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

We weren't that far away last year.

I know we can put it together this year!

What do you do when no one respects you? When you're so low you're not even an underdog? When your enemies are called kings? William Wallace would fight for every yard with his face painted aqua and orange. And so we will fight, not just for yards, but for touchdowns. And then they will fear us.
Chad Henne is 7 feet tall and consumes DBs with fireballs from his eyes and lightning bolts from his ass.

by BravePhin on Aug 10, 2011 7:53 PM EDT reply actions  

Great to see you posting again Rz

Funny post as usual. Love it

Daily Phinsider reader since its creation.

Henne Beleiver '12

by Rytackle on Aug 10, 2011 7:53 PM EDT reply actions  

Few things

I guess there is copyright rules and stuff as a front page dealio…so i have to learn what is ok to use..as far ans you tube..and links..and what isnt.

also i was told not too much foul language and stuff..but i dunno what too much is…so to be honest…kinda felt like my hands were tied a little.

thanks for reading…hope as i figure out what is ok…i can provide more

by Rzayo24 on Aug 10, 2011 7:59 PM EDT reply actions  

hahahaha!

its not you…its the man! i started this post off with “no editors censoring” but i realize i cant be all dick jokey here…as much.

ill get a feel for it…good to be back…hope i can contribute more

by Rzayo24 on Aug 10, 2011 8:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

... so, basically, you confessed to stealing Target of their candied goodies....

LOL

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions  

100%...

i shopped for an hour and was told i had to go home…i was getting something…i basically got to “pick out things i WOULD LIKE to have” then got to leave.

i ate so much candy i didnt eat dinner…it was awesome.

It was a tornado warning…for a second it felt like i would be stuck there like a Dawn of the Dead or something

by Rzayo24 on Aug 11, 2011 2:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

Excellent.

Dawn of the Dead was awesome….. lol

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 5:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

Nothing is better than your puns lol

glad to have you back brother!

Laces out!
Editor of the Wildcat Weekly after every Victory
-2008 AFC East Champions-
BRANDON MARSHALL- FUTURE MIAMI HOF WR!!!!!

by BSerious72 on Aug 10, 2011 8:20 PM EDT reply actions  

New season, new rules, NO MORE PHINS UP DANCE! Have some damn pride Phins fans, do not put your hands on your heads this season, and go left to right – you look RIDICULOUS! We are better than this, this is a proud franchise damnit! You can’t possibly make fun of Fireman Ed’s J-E-T-S chant, then prance around like that – you can’t have it both ways.

Best quote of this off season!

Kacy Rodgers! (Our D-Line Coach) Got to give him some credit.
Rusty Smith! (Titans future qb)
Play to win

by 54 on Aug 10, 2011 8:33 PM EDT reply actions  

Oh please don't chant "and that's another Miami first down!!!" when we are being shutout of the game 4th Q. (Bears) It's embarrassing.

The bears fans I went with still greet me with that phase.

Kacy Rodgers! (Our D-Line Coach) Got to give him some credit.
Rusty Smith! (Titans future qb)
Play to win

by 54 on Aug 10, 2011 8:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

well we had to celebrate the small victories...

"The first thing I do when I get out of bed and feel the jolt in my knees is think of Roy Winston. On the second step, my calcified Adam's apple starts bobbing, and I think of Carl Eller. A few more steps in the dark and it's Willie Lanier. By the time I get to the bathroom, I'm flashing back to Dick Butkus and Ray Nitschke. And when the light finally comes on, I just hope that somewhere in the darkness they're thinking of me, too" - Larry Csonka.
He played before my time but one of the toughest SOBs to ever play!

by Strange on Aug 10, 2011 10:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

Long live the Rizz!

Great to have you back.

Re-posting some of your classic posts from the past might be a great way to acquaint the newbies with who you are.

You have to play this game like somebody just hit your mother with a two-by-four.
-Dan Birdwell

by snook36 on Aug 10, 2011 8:48 PM EDT reply actions  

That!

is a great idea!
Those ITM posts are flat out hilarious!

I will agree to disagree with you - as long as you understand that I'm right.

by Tunaflipper on Aug 10, 2011 10:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

LOL

I dunno if they would hold up…and i cant front page them because they are RATED R~!!!

Good to see yall again…this is a working title/article…just a start..its my training camp

by Rzayo24 on Aug 10, 2011 10:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

No.

No no, it’s bad that you have to be asked.

I will agree to disagree with you - as long as you understand that I'm right.

by Tunaflipper on Aug 10, 2011 10:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

LOL

"The first thing I do when I get out of bed and feel the jolt in my knees is think of Roy Winston. On the second step, my calcified Adam's apple starts bobbing, and I think of Carl Eller. A few more steps in the dark and it's Willie Lanier. By the time I get to the bathroom, I'm flashing back to Dick Butkus and Ray Nitschke. And when the light finally comes on, I just hope that somewhere in the darkness they're thinking of me, too" - Larry Csonka.
He played before my time but one of the toughest SOBs to ever play!

by Strange on Aug 10, 2011 10:42 PM EDT up reply actions  

"If Serena Williams asks you to rub your nipples after every TD, would you do it?"

Is J-Lo rubbing hers as well? If so….

"The first thing I do when I get out of bed and feel the jolt in my knees is think of Roy Winston. On the second step, my calcified Adam's apple starts bobbing, and I think of Carl Eller. A few more steps in the dark and it's Willie Lanier. By the time I get to the bathroom, I'm flashing back to Dick Butkus and Ray Nitschke. And when the light finally comes on, I just hope that somewhere in the darkness they're thinking of me, too" - Larry Csonka.
He played before my time but one of the toughest SOBs to ever play!

by Strange on Aug 10, 2011 10:42 PM EDT reply actions  

Finsnation folk actually have a fierce "J-Lo is overrated" policy

Wanna prove you are a true heatfan? Remind people you lived through the Mark Blount era

by kazam92 on Aug 10, 2011 11:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

I don't care how rated she is

I have been married nearly 10 years and have two kids… J-Lo is f-ing hot.

"The first thing I do when I get out of bed and feel the jolt in my knees is think of Roy Winston. On the second step, my calcified Adam's apple starts bobbing, and I think of Carl Eller. A few more steps in the dark and it's Willie Lanier. By the time I get to the bathroom, I'm flashing back to Dick Butkus and Ray Nitschke. And when the light finally comes on, I just hope that somewhere in the darkness they're thinking of me, too" - Larry Csonka.
He played before my time but one of the toughest SOBs to ever play!

by Strange on Aug 11, 2011 12:49 AM EDT up reply actions  

lmao....

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 1:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Great post

Wanna prove you are a true heatfan? Remind people you lived through the Mark Blount era

by kazam92 on Aug 10, 2011 11:43 PM EDT reply actions  

Great to see you back RZ. Houw about Matty I is the first to go up on the Phinsider Ring of Honor

Just think how stupid the average Jest fan is, and then realize that half of them are even stupider! ( a parody of a George Carlin line)

by PhinsTifosi on Aug 11, 2011 12:13 AM EDT reply actions  

Great Post as Always

Let me help you out with something. It is obvious to me you where tramatized by the blackout at Target the other day. So much so you are not thinking straight about the events to which you fell “Victim” to.

You must have slipped and fell face first into the mixed candies when the lights went out. I think you are dam lucky to be alive and it is fortunate that you do not want to “SUE” them for the trauma you have suffered.

Speaking of Target. Can someone do something about the Target drop down ad on this site. It blocks out everything and has no close button on it.

Maybe we can get Daball and TS to do the Worm after every TD. Just a thought.

The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is.
Winston Churchill

by FinFanFromCA on Aug 11, 2011 12:52 AM EDT reply actions  

Good to see ya back rizzy.

I’ve just been posting again recently myself. I think and hope you’re right. This should be a fun and exciting season!

Phinsider HOF C/O 2010
Winner of 2 "Matty's" Creator of the "Samory"
When i die, i want to be reincarnated as OFF4L.
"- Lousaka Monster only masturbates to pictures of The Lousaka Monster." --- Rzayo24
13 1/2 phinsider fued points!!!

by MrMedic on Aug 11, 2011 1:46 AM EDT reply actions  

Welcome back ya crazy basturd!

We (I) have missed your senseless ramblings! Lol

I too am cautiously excited about our teams season!

Jimbo

by Dolphinator on Aug 11, 2011 7:51 AM EDT via mobile reply actions  

this was great

i couldn’t agree more about the “fins up” shit, and giving Daboll a chance.

great to have u back Riz

Self-proclaimed president of the Pat White and Brian Hartline fan club.
The one and only "ho-nerd"

by samdaman on Aug 11, 2011 8:18 AM EDT reply actions  

fuck that fins up chant

i have always refused to do it, and i always sing the old(?) fight song, it’s what i grew up with

so good to see you posting again

- LN21 and MHTD - Going Commando
- Mi lugar favorito es compañero de apartamento juevos

by MiamihastheDolphins.... on Aug 11, 2011 12:37 PM EDT reply actions  

Welcome back Riz... here's a present for ya...

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 2:09 PM EDT reply actions  

LMAO....

"The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos."
"Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed."
"Koa Misi -- the A.J. Duhe of this decade!"

by Alpha6 on Aug 11, 2011 4:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

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