Ahhh the holiday season. A time of year wrought with cold weather (65 degrees in NYC today. What the fu...?), horrifying parking lot fights, and atrocious marketing ploys designed to seperate us from every last dollar we have managed to squirrel away throughout the year. However, it is also a time for blessings, as disguised as they might be. And the Miami Dolphins just received an early Christmas present, or maybe a timely Hannukah present, or even a Kwanzaa gift that is early.....or late. (OK, I have to admit that I have no idea when Kwanzaa is. So have me arrested, liberal PC police.) And that gift came in the form of an afternoon press conference from southern California, where a 70 degree December day is not quite so apocalyptic. Of course, I am referring to the announcement that Matt Barkley will be returning to USC for his senior year in 2012.
I know, I know. At first, I cursed the little jerkoff and threw my hands into the air in disgust. I mean, now the QB pool is limited, and of course this will make the asking price for a trade to a higher draft pick soar like a Red Bull powered rocket, whether it be for Luck or RGIII. But there is an upside.....
Now, the way is clear. Now, the fog is lifted. Now, there is no longer any need for question, indecision, or hesitation. There are now only two things that matter in the 2012 NFL Entry Draft. And they go by the names Luck, and Griffin. I will focus this post on the latter, because I think the price for the number one pick will be prohibitive (Shefter reported on ESPN this morning that the Colts/Rams will be looking for four, count them FOUR future first round picks. Sorry, too much.)
This front office now has only ONE possible course of action, and it is a simple one. The number two pick MUST be acquired, and Robert Griffin III MUST be reporting to South Beach for his rookie OTA's next spring. And there can be no playing around. The FO and coach, to be named later, must have laser-like focus, and the kind of commitment to a single-minded purpose that usually only exists when an assassin is stalking his prey, or when Rex Ryan wants a sandwich.
Matt Barkley has eliminated the need for endless hours of research and debate. Instead of countless arguments over which QB is better, or whether or not either be available for us at our draft position, the future now is made up of two absolutes: 1. Griffin is absolutely the guy. 2. He will absolutely NOT be available when we draft. So now we know what needs to be done. A representative of the FO should be on the phone with whoever has the first and second pick the very second the regular season is over, and a trade package must be worked out.
So thank you Matt Barkley. Thank you for showing us the way. We should be eternally grateful.
Yes, this is my attempt to be a more "positive" fan, as many of you have suggested. So I'm giving it a try.
(And let's all be honest: Can you blame the guy for wanting to prolong his time as a good-looking USC QB for as long as possible? "Excuse me, countless perfect tens, with your fake tits and real tans, but Im going to report to the NFL early, so I can get my ass kicked by men three times my size for the next year"....Yeah, I dont think so.)
--- It has occured to me that most, if not all, NFL teams have an impossible time dealing with the new breed of big, strong, glue-handed Tight Ends that are infiltrating the league. So here's my idea: Why not draft the next athletic TE prospect, and put him on defense? I mean, if I was New England, I would continue to let Gronkowski do his thing, and move Hernandez to defense and put him on all opposing TE's. I'm thinking of the cliche that "it takes a criminal, to catch a criminal." Im not an X's and O's guy, so I know there are probably a thousand reasons this is a stupid idea, which I'm sure many of you will feel free to tell me. So let''s make the comments section more interesting. If you are going to tell me how stupid my idea is, you MUST start your comment with "Hey Stupid:" Deal?
--- There is a part of me, albeit a small part, that is rooting for the Jets this weekend. Simply because I want to be the ones to destroy their season next week, rather than watching the Giants do it this week. Look for a post next week outlining, in detail, my hatred for those scumbags.
--- If you haven't already, go directly to the Fanshot section and check out the picture and caption from the Jets-Eagles game that PatsSuck456 posted (Its in the Recommended Fanshot section). It is the funniest thing I have ever seen on this sight, and no matter how many times I have seen it, it still makes me laugh every time.
--- I have done a 180 on the coaching prospects for this team. I was a strict Cowher guy, but I have changed my mind. Coaching takes a tireless commitment and an almost manic frame of mind. And I just don't know that a guy like Cowher would really have the burning fire for the job that it would require. Im not questioning his integrity or work ethic, but I would feel better with the team in the hands of a hungry young up and comer, looking to make his mark on the league. Or even Fisher would work, cause I see him as a guy who feels he has alot of unfinished business in the league, rather than a guy like Cowher who cemented a legacy than voluntarily left the sidelines.
--- I am not a sentimental guy. However, I think it's important to wish you all a wonderful, healthy and happy holiday season, and continued happiness through the new year. So make sure that you take time over the coming days to remember what is really important in this world: That the goddamn Jets are not allowed, under any circumstances, to make the playoffs this year. Shalom....
P.S. I used to be able to link my posts to my Facebook page by checking a box in the editing section. That box has disappeared and now only the Twitter box is there. Anyone know what happened? Is there a new way for me to link this to Facebook now?
This fanpost was written by one of The Phinsider's registered users.