Window Trolling

I like to window shop. Sometimes I like to troll. Combine the two, you get window trolling. I was taking a gander over at Pat's Pulpit, you all know who pat is right? She/it/he looks (say it fast) like... this:

via upload.wikimedia.org

A sexually ambiguous creature that confuses men and women alike. This isn't important, but what is important, but not really, but really is... is...

The outright New England snobbery that comes from being from New England evident all over Pat's (see above) pulpit. Let me note that if you're a Dolphin fan in New England you are a genetic abberation blessed with the common sense and wisdom that doesn't proliferate the gene pool in said region. Moving on...

If I were to take a blanket and threw it on a statement, that is what I would get from the Patriot fans: we are racists (okay, finsx did call one ref a mexican, but to be completely fair, finsx also loves Greg Camarillo who is half-Mexican - so it ain't racist, if you love one mexican and hate another - by the way I love Mexico, for the record - and Cuba, I love cuban food).

Our whining about their classlessness. Do I really need to consult Buffalo fans, Redskin fans, and others about this? Really? Do I need to? Apparently they think, "Score differential is a factor in division and wild-card standings. If a team can do what the Pats did at the end, they’re obligated to."  I'm sorry, if you lock up a division in week, I don't know, what was it, 10, last year, do you really need to run up the score for playoff purposes? NFL rules state if you go 16-0 you're locking up the #1 seed. Maybe I am whining, maybe that guy is a yooooge word in a Manfred Mann song about being blinded by light. But what I do know is that there was a large dialogue about runing up the score that went slightly unnoticed because of another camera involved scandal. Should I reiterate classlessness? Yes, I will

Class. Less. Ness.

Keeping with the lies and hypocrisy theme:

"Shula had the refs in his pocket and they NEVER seemed to get a bad call against them" O really? Gee, let's take a look at the Snow plow game, maybe even the Tuck game, or maybe let's look at today's game. Randy Moss blatantly, like shooting a kitten in your face just to get your disgusted reaction blatantly, push offs that led to a TD. Randy Moss, the atheletic phenom who makes many a CB cower is also one of the most blatant 'cheaters' in the game. But, the Patriot's motto, which LaDainian 'I'm worthy of a Superbowl more than the Pats are' Tomlinson once said so eloquently, "if you ain't cheatin', you ain't trying". I still think Randy Moss is amazing, even if he does those things consistently, because he can do the same without pushing and interfering as much.

Matt Light. Oh, Matt Light. I don't know if he is a "faggot". I don't really care. I do know that he is definately not Mike Tyson (circa when he was good). In fact, his boxing technique is so garbage Channing Crowder skipped away. He didn't really run away, he skipped like he was playing hopscotch. If that doesn't signify that Matt Light is the least scariest dude in the NFL then I don't know what would. Usually when people get swung at they are get angry and mad, etcetera. Laughing Crowder skipped away. Who laughs when they are getting punched at? Anyone know? It's like Ricky Gervais talking about that Falklands war, it was the equivalent of holding a midget at arms length away while kicking him in the bullocks. It's funny because you know a midget can swing at you all he wants... he's just got too small of arms so it doesn't matter. It's funny. Matt Light is Argentina, Channing Crowder is the United Kingdom. And speaking of England, there must be zero Patriots fans. I don't think I saw one at the London game. Who would root for a team based on the revolutionaries who beat you in our war of Independence. Zero. That's why the Fins are more popular over seas.

The Phinsider is one of the best blogs on SB nation. To put it in political terms, it is a big tent party. We encompass a lot of ground from all over the United States. We have LCFF whose obviously on the west coast, to Husk in that fly over state called Nebraska, I'm in Kentucky, and we have our resident Miami-area locals, and the manager Matty who lives in Jersey. So when people say :

"You could have 500 comments a gamethread if you kept finsx, Louie, etc., around and let them trash the place."

I say no, you can't. They don't make up the bulk of our threads, a lot more people do. We are more passionate about football than you are. When Randy Moss scores a TD the Pat's Pulpit gets a few token comments. When Camarillo catches a ball this house erupts like Krakatao. Some might even say it erupts like a soccer stadium in Mexico city when the home team scores a goal. Whatever, we all go ape shit.

I challenge their fanhood because they don't show it like we do. We cheer over everything and we fight over anything. We had more personal attacks on each other than the Broncos when we lost this game because we have one common goal: to see the Dolphins do good. We don't hate each other, we hate losing, because we are passionate, we are dedicated, we are louder, more aggressive and better fans than they are.

Just let me take a note on our aggressiveness though. We don't need to raid the Pat's gender ambiguity site with pithy comments, we should just watch. Laugh. Enjoy it. Every shooting star turns into a falling star, the Patriots hit their zenith. When they start losing games their comment total will slip. When we start losing games are comment total will rise because we're extra volatile, like today.

That's my two cents. Hope you enjoyed it. And if you're a Pats fan, including my brother and old roomate, %^&@ off and have a lovely day! :)